Hello, since many years now my domain name has been stolen from me. Now it’s for sale but for $3000 and I don’t have that kind of money. My question is, if I backorder it, won’t this trigger the owner to keep on renewing it each year hoping that one day I will buy it from him? Isn’t there a way to reserve my domain name or get notified when it goes back to sell without the seller to know?

See https://www.domainsherpa.com/domain-name-dictionary/life-cycle-of-a-typical-gtld-domain-name/. They start it in auction listings after it expires and before pending delete. I don’t know the exact dates, but if you monitor it you’ll see it go from auction, to closeout, to drop. You’ll need an auctions.godaddy.com account (I believe $5 per year) to bid and buy.
We do not only have Expired Domains, but you can also find lists of Deleted Domains for a lot of TLDs. Deleted Domains or Dropped Domains are available for registration and can be picked up for just the normal regfee at your preferred domain registrar! All Domains have the typical SEO relevant data, like Number of Backlinks, Archive.org Birth Date and a lot more.